Best Bond Movies: Skyfall and Goldeneye Don’t Make the Cut

Warning! Contains Skyfall spoilers (for the three of you who haven’t seen the movie by the time this is posted).

As an addendum to the Top 5 Bond Movies posts I want to explain why certain movies (most notably Skyfall) did not make the cut. Most of my fellow bloggers seem to be boldly declaring Skyfall as the best Bond film ever. I go against the grain here and, in fact, Skyfall does not even make my Top 5. I explain my reasoning below.

GOLDENEYE

Goldeneye is an excellent movie. It stands head and shoulders above all the other Pierce Brosnan Bond movies. Famke Janssen is excellent in the movie as well.

My problem with Goldeneye is I could never get past the scene at the beginning of the movie where James Bond jumps off a cliff, without a parachute, catches a plane, climbs in said plane and then flies off into the yonder….

I know some of my readers are cynical, so let me try to summarize what you are thinking right now. I predict you are rhetorically asking:

Let me get this straight Beau…You are telling me that you are okay with with a villainous named On-A-Top, that kills men by crushing them between her thighs while having sex, and who has cunningly parlayed this skill into taking control of a secret space laser that will destroy the world as we know it–you are okay with that realistic plot. Oh, and along the way the entire Russian military can’t hit a guy walking around Moscow in a $4,000 suit that stands out like a soar thumb…thousands of bullets magically hit is feet in true A-Team fashion. The AK-47 has for decades been know to be the most dependable assault rifle ever made, yet 100s of soldiers can’t make a sissy shot with it. You accept that bit or realism Beau, but  James Bond escaping in a plane is where you draw the line at the movie being unbelievable?

Yes. That is what I am saying. They ruined a good movie with that stupid scene. It was very unnecessary.

Ha! There is a YouTube video! As you will see someone with even more free time than me is also bothered by the scene!

SKYFALL

Skyfall is an awesome movie. There are no qualifications needed to that statement. The fact it doesn’t make my sentimental Top 5 List is no judgment on whether the movie itself is excellent. Maybe I picked the other Bond movies because I love the water, and they all have more water involved than the others. Maybe I am sentimental about my boyhood. Maybe I am not ready for Bond to have a homo-erotic captor…

Skyfall is great movie, but not quintessential Bond. Shouldn’t the Top 5 Bond movies should highlight quintessential Bond?

I love the way they rejected all the gadgets in the movie. That is exactly what the franchise needed. The introduction of Moneypenny was nicely done, as was reintroducing the old office with the new M. It was excellent. Excellent references to the old movies as well. I loved the subtlety of the references as well. I think Skyfall will hold up well over the long haul since it made a point of rejecting previously overdone gadgetry.

This movie is more of an ensemble project than a one man show . Judy Dench and Javier Bardem are the stars as much as Daniel Craig.

A James Bond that cries? A James Bond that has inner conflict about killing? I’m not ready to be sentimental about that yet. It is not quintessential Bond. It is not the movie you show your sons to teach them what 007 is all about.  As Mick LaSalle of the San Francisco Chronicle says:

Skyfall” is a different kind of Bond movie, one that works just fine on its own terms, but a steady diet of this might kill the franchise. One “Skyfall” is enough.

Please indulge me with a Star Trek analogy: I’m a Captain Kirk guy. Jean-Luc Picard was great for the Next Generation, but I remain a Captain Kirk man. When the Klingons killed his son, Kirk said “You Klingon bastards killed my son!” You immediately knew the Klingon body count was about to go up.

Jean-Luc Picard, on the other hand, would have had to talk to Counselor Troi about his feelings. He would have had a meeting in the ready room to discuss what to do…have a group discussion and show what it is like to be enlightened human beings and all that shit…while Kirk was already blowing some shit up.

The new Bond is sort-of the same way.

Skyfall is not the best Bond movie of all time.

OTHERS

Many people consider Goldfinger, Diamonds are Forever, To Live and Let Die, For Your Eyes Only, and Her Majesty’s Secret Service to be Top 5 worthy.

Those people are wrong.

FINALLY…

I just found this…this guy reviewed all the Bond flicks. Succinctly even: (Wow. Apparently there are others in this world who have as much free time as me!)

SEE ALSO:

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3 thoughts on “Best Bond Movies: Skyfall and Goldeneye Don’t Make the Cut

  1. Pingback: Best Bond Movies #1: Thunderball « Smooth ReEntry

  2. Pingback: Trekker vs Trekkie « Smooth ReEntry

  3. Pingback: Star Trek: Odds on Even | Smooth ReEntry

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