Welcome to Movember…a month where, in the name of men’s health awareness, men have an excuse to be slobs and not shave. Raising awareness of men’s health issues is a noble cause. Naturally, I will not be writing about that.
As I enter singledom, how cool facial hair is or isn’t is my chief concern–prostate cancer concerns can wait. Ironically, the fact that I am concerned with what other people think makes me very uncool by definition. It is quite the paradox and I will add this topic to the growing list of inner-self / personal growth issues I should blog about. I so wish I could be like the cool mo-fo in the Southern Comfort commercial. He is like the Honey Badger–He don’t give a shit. He just does what he wants and is himself. That is when you are cool. When you don’t give a shit. I am not like that.
Incidentally, Southern Comfort is to a whiskey connoisseur like White Zinfandel is to a wine connoisseur. That makes this guy even cooler–sort of like the person who likes to drink a chilled merlot. You like what you like and don’t care what other people think. But I digress…
My over-analyzing facial hair hit next level when I listened to a Stuff Mom Never Told You podcast episode on the subject. They basically came to the conclusion that for initial attraction, the unshaven stubble look was the way to go. But once the man is caught, women preferred the clean shaven look.
Although Cristen Conger would never phrase it this way, I will. This is prime example of the Ladder Theory in action. I can totally see women saying they like the clean shaven look, but really liking the rougher unshaven look. It goes with the primal instincts of wanting to breed with the strongest man, but keep the stable man on the hook. I am starting to think that contradiction is an inherent part of women’s DNA. Some are more self-aware than others, some have more self control than others, but the underlying feelings are there. (IMO, those who deny mixed feelings are the ones most likely to have a slip-up once they catch the man they think they want.) But I digress yet again (FUCK!)…
After listening to that episode I was confident that clean shaven and 5 O’clock shadow were the looks to go for. But in celebration of Movember, Zoosk releases this interesting research claiming, “Goatee is well-loved by American women”.
So I ask you, is this true? Do American women really love goatees? If so, I am going to have to rethink my whole opinion on facial hair. Personally, I have seen one too many goatees at NASCAR races to be comfortable with it. But I thought I would ask the readers what you think.
- Soon2becatlady posted some excellent thoughts on the subject here.
- I wrote about this subject previously here.
- This blogger thinks beards are sexy and marvelous.
- I am going to repost my poll below. PLEASE VOTE. Do I need to add goatee as an option?