Closed Minds and Short Fuses

Here is some advice from online dating expert Rachel DeAlto, “…Keep an open mind”.

It is amazing how many woman avoid me like the plague because I have “separated” status. Hey–I understand. My status isn’t sexy. My status is full of buzz-killing pragmatic issues. We’re talking real-world crap that you’ll never see in a Disney movie. It isn’t fun. I get it.

So I understand a woman not putting me at the top of her prospects list. That makes perfect sense.

But avoiding me like the plague? –I don’t get that.

I am not going to win any fans with this, but my frustrations ran over this week, I vented on this poor woman who happened to email me at the wrong time.  My short fuse didn’t sync well with her closed mind. See conversation below.




Obviously I am an asshole for going overboard and venting on POF Woman #1 that harshly. Rude tone aside, do you think I am on target with my theory that these women have been burned in the past and are jaded towards all men now? So much so that they won’t even give us a chance?

5 thoughts on “Closed Minds and Short Fuses

  1. Hey there, thought i would just add a few things as a woman ( previously on pof/okc).

    I did post on my profile that i was not looking for anyone married, separated or recently divorced (within 6 months).

    The main reason for this is not so much where the guy is emotionally BUT how his soon to be wife/ ex wife is handling the ending of the relationship. Alot of men and women are very different in this aspect. If the man was the one initiating the divorce, women can become very bitter, angry and psycho. And look for any and everyone to blame. And even if you’ve never had an affair, they will look for everything possible to prove that you were unfaithful all along.

    I’ve realized that most men on the other hand, usually “emotionally” check out of the relationship months before , therefore allowing them to date or become interested in another woman sooner.

    Honestly, i waited three years to date after my divorce. Only because i didn’t think it was fair that any guy have to deal with the drama that i was going through, nor was it a safe situation. But everyone is different.

    I’ve talked to several guys that were going through a divorce but i made it clear that i could not date them until the divorce was finalized for the reasons above. But i would love to get to know them as a friend until then. Besides, you might find someone who really likes you for you, if theres no pressure of ” dating”.

    And if you are just looking for a fun time or booty call, im sure there are plenty of women out there who could care less if you are married or separated. But most quality women will wait. I know i would, if he’s (you) are a good man!

  2. Ahh! You can’t get mad at strange women on the internet for not wanting to date you! You’ve never met – they don’t owe you anything. No, not even a response.

    Also, you don’t come off as such a great “nice” guy when you get so immediately confrontational. If she doesn’t want to go out, move on.

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